When I was growing up, I always knew I wanted to be a mother one day, I envisioned the type of mom I would be- nurturing, attentive, playful, but with expectations of respect and a work ethic for my little ones. I remember babysitting for others' children as a teenager and thinking how strange it was for them to call so often while they were away, that maybe they didn't trust me, or they knew something that I didn't about how their kids would behave. I totally get it now. It didn't really have anything to do with me particularly, just the fact that they were away from their kids... it can be a struggle to trust anyone besides yourself with your kids.
I was definitely unprepared for how I would feel about my body after baby! Apparently, in my mind I thought, "baby's out, body goes back to the way it was...instantly." Ha! Getting used to stretch marks, bigger boobs that just kinda make me feel like the character Gru- big upper body, with little legs sticking out ;)- and just the overwhelming feeling that my body doesn't really belong to me anymore, has been a strange sense to get used to.
I know each day will get easier, and soon I may beg for just a little time away for myself. But right now, I am perfectly fine with our quiet days of snuggles, nursing, and playing!
